Man Rolls Into The Sea

Maine’s population is one short today, as one man decided to roll into the sea. Rather than seek a divorce, Robert Norton of Bangor, Maine, decided he’d just sleep with the fishes: literally and figuratively. 

“Plenty of fish in the sea,” Robert told reporters before he began his barrel roll off the beach, “And I intend to find the love of my life.”

Robert’s family will hold a funeral service for him on Friday, August 24th. There is an attendance fee of $10. 

Rest in peace Robert